Rendering Tallow {Quick Method}

Oh, how to find eloquent enough words to describe the slightly repugnant process of rendering tallow? First off, maybe we could begin with what tallow is. Tallow is the rendered fat that surrounds the kidneys in an animal such as a cow. Once rendered, the fat is very similar to lard in appearance and functionality in the kitchen and it has a high smoke point. Which makes tallow an ideal candidate for deep-frying foods, like french fries. In fact, according to Wikipedia, McDonald's used tallow to fry it's world famous french fries until the early 90's when the no-fat fad became the newest obsession. Some people use the unrendered tallow as suet or food for birds. But, I'm not like most people. I use it for cooking because it is a rich source of CLA fat, an anti-cancer fighting agent. Terriffic! Bring on the tallow! According to www.beeftallow.com: Tallow is an excellent source of niacin, vitamins B6, B12, K2, selenium, iron, phosphorus, potassium and riboflavin. Grassfed beef tallow contains high ratio of conjugated linoleic acid (CLA) which is a cancer-resistant agent. Contrary to the popular conception, tallow is good for health as tallow fat is similar to the fat/muscles in the heart. Recent studies have shown that human beings need at least 50% of saturated fats like tallow and lard to keep the heart pumping hale and healthy. Tallow from pasture-raised cows also contains a small amount of Vitamin D, similar to lard. 

But seriously, people - this isn't for the faint of heart. I'm leaving all photos small because no one wants to see rendering tallow in photos up close.  After a quick web search on rendering tallow I was barely patient enough to find two different methods. One method ground the tallow in a food processor, my processor has a 4-cup capacity. Guess how long grinding 8 pounds of tallow would take? Three days. No thanks. The second method suggested boiling the chopped fat in water first. I see how that adds no benefit. Let's review. Too small of a food processor and boiling in water takes too much time. Let's plow on with the Becki Let's Just Try It My Way and See How it Goes Method!

Sausage & Orzo Stuffed Delicata Squash

 

Minnesota has me in a funk today. The trees have lost all their leaves becoming brown, withered, boring and sad - leaving no hope for life. The lawn is frozen solid so when you prance across there is no give whatsoever - leaving no anticipation of a mid-afternoon lawn wrestle with these cuties. The temps are bitter and the wind whips through the windows like Old Man Winter is right around the corner, He was here, but melted in 3 days. I prefer dazzling white to brown, withered and sad. The negativity abounds this evening. There is no hope of sun. Ever. Again.

I'm sitting here, staring out the window, asking myself the age old question: Is this all there is? It's horrible. So I googled becoming a Food Scientist. That lasted all of 3.6 seconds after I discovered a background in physics and calculus is recommended. Let's just stop while we're ahead, mmmK?

Now that I've completely depressed you and myself even further let's commence to stare at the first photo I captured of this beautiful delicata squash! Isn't it pretty? I know!!!!!! Makes me hungry!

Chocolate Chip Kale Cookies

I've just put kale into a cookie. I'm fairly certain I literally never thought I would say those words in a complete sentence together, but I just did. The recipe is from a super cute cookbook 50 Shades of Kale by Drew Ramsey & Jennifer Iserloh that I received for Christmas this year. The cookbook does a little spoof on the book it's obviously based on and ties up kale in S&M chains and whips. Very kitchy. But, the most exciting part is all the kale! When I saw that kale was in a cookie I was seriously hooked. I counted the days, minutes, seconds before I could eat this cookie. It seemed like years before I actually got my food processor out and chopped those kale leaves I so lovingly blanched this summer into teeny little flecks of green that my sweet little men surely wouldn't recognize as something healthy and would straightaway devour. Fortunately I was saved from eating 2 dozen Chocolate Chip Kale Cookies because everyone approved of this cookie! Even the hubs. He jokingly wondered what I would next put into a cookie as I was chopping up kidney offal for a separate project I'll be sure to tell you about soon! But, for now...back to cookies!

Tomato Basil Soup

There can be nothing more comforting than pulling from the freezer bright orange, yellow and red once juicy tomatoes and fragrant, lively basil putting them together and eating them in the middle of a February snow storm that just. will. not. go. away. We've officially earned the title MinnSNOWta this winter. Serisouly ridiculous. I look outside and all I see is a real life snow globe. I'm sure this isn't fair to the loves of my life, but sometimes I dream of where my husband and I will retire to the minute we are empty nesters. Sedona? Palm Springs? Fort Meyers? And those are the things that get a woman through. Besides eating bright, fresh and lively flavors mid-winter snow storm. 

Bacon & Spinach Quiche

I wish I could tell you that I formed that beautiful ridge on this Bacon & Spinach Quiche, but I didn't. A computer-operated machine in a factory did. But I just need to say - For The Record - I usually roll out my own crust with lard, but during the holiday's the mark-down at the grocery store for these babies is like stealing, so I steal a couple and put my homemade aspirations aside for the sake of thriftiness and convenience. 

After the awkwardness of having this weirdly shaped and seriously breakable item in my freezer for 3 months got to me bad, I decided it was time to give this crust some meaning. A quiche! What better way to provide fast breakfast to my family? Easy lunch. Light supper. It's a 3-4-1. And the fillings are endless. It's just an easily learned method. And I'm here to tell you about it. 

Smitten Kitchen Brownies

How about a recipe that's fitting for Valentine's Day? Would that be anything with chocolate? Growing up my dad would give us a small chocolate Whitman's heart every Valentine's Day. Unfortunately for me, I found out after reminiscing about those lovely memories it wasn't my father, but my mother who was providing the Whitman's. So depressing. So, no, I'm not going to wax on about how much I love to hate Valentine's Day. How much ridiculous pressure it puts on our men. The outrageous price of red roses and women's expectations to receive them. The day of love when all you really want is someone to pick up the toys so you don't trip and kill yourself and maybe unload the dishwasher so you don't have to do it for what feels like the gazillionth time, but you're suppose to want a dozen roses that are going to die in a week, but cost the price of a pair of Lululemon leggings and that's what you really want. No, I wouldn't share all that here in this space because that would be really weird and a total over share. So I'll just share chocolate with you. And theeese iiiis some guuuud chocolate (that's me impersonating a Mexican chihuahua). You're not still here, are you? If you are, get out. Now. 

Kale & Cheese Pinwheels

Ever since I vowed to put kale on my radar I've been doing a pretty good job and sadly, the frozen kale that I blanched this summer is dwindling, so in my next posts you may not see as much kale, but I assure you other green things will always be present in my kitchen making their way into the blogosphere, because this laugh out loud Slate article said I should be on an All Kale Diet if I want to have true meaning to my life.

As far as recipes that incorporate kale go, I'd say this one has got to be the least healthy - not really earning any real superfood points because kale enveloped in puff pastry can't really be categorized as a superfood for the fact that puff pastry negates the kale with pure butter, fat, and empty calories which I'm fairly certain Dr. Oz suggests you should eat all superfoods in that way if you're having a difficult time eating enough superfoods. And if you're wondering if kale really is the superfood its been cracked up to be for the last 5 years this article proves and explains all the beautiful aspects of kale you never knew you needed to know. 

Cashew Stir-Fry with Mushrooms & Bok Choy

Craving a quick, mid-week meal that is full of flavor, filling and healthy (but not too healthy - as in - no flavor, totally boring and makes you just want to dive into a box of Milk Duds)? Well, look no further because I'm here to give you just that meal.

Kale, Sweet Potato, & Bacon Bow Tie Pasta

I am having major writer's block while trying to brainstorm enough words to make a post on this absolutely delicious pasta. But words are leaving me. Blank brain. Fingers just keep moving and after about 8 minutes you'll have unwittingly typed up enough describing details to make people want to eat kale. And sweet potatoes. And bacon. And pasta. Because after I get to thinking about eating this pasta my fingers are seemingly moving very fast because this pasta was delicious! And healthy! And easy to make! So get excited people.

Pot Roast & Hot Sauerkraut Sandwich

Could this be one of the reasons why my husband fell in love with me so many years ago? Because I can make a really tasty sandwich? Probably. Because sandwiches are straight up man food. Meaty Man Food.

Vegetable Breakfast Loaf

I'm not sure how to deliciously describe this weird bread creation that I have somehow figured into a loaf-form and named semi-appropriately. The original image that inspired me to frantically form loaves for a friend's jewelry party is a gazillion times more beautiful and appetizing.

After staring at the pin of the bread for what seemed like 16 times a day I realized spring will be coming soon and suddenly must rid my freezer of all summer produce and this bread was just the recipe to use up those 2 huge bags of frozen shredded zucchini and summer squash.

Wild Rice Pilaf

I'm having a hard time being positive about this Wild Rice Pilaf because I'm on a maniacal fruit cleanse where you pretty much starve yourself for 7 days (not really, but I told you I'm not feeling very positive). Something ridiculous about going on a tropical cruise with 5 other svelte women drives you into a starvation diet. Or maybe it's the obnoxious fact that this cruise is timed right after the eating and drinking holiday madness. Either way, I loathe myself for even saying the word diet. I don't diet! I just eat small portions (only a half truth) - and I make good choices like fruits and veggies (sometimes true - love my Twizzlers!). And I work out - a lot (this is pretty much true). Sigh. But, I am dieting. 

However! I do feel powerful saying NO! to coffee - even for a couple days. I cannot describe the fog on the first morning or raging headache that same afternoon (absolutely positively going back to coffee once this madness is over). However! I literally JUMPED out of bed the second day, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Two great things are developing from my diet: self-control and an inner body cleanse that is energy giving. Om. I release all bad feelings from this cleanse into the universe and grab onto peace and calm and wild rice. Come.

Kale & Feta Meatballs

Are you like me and avoid making meatballs because you think making a meatball dinner is wayyy too much effort and dish clean-up? First, make the meat mixture, then roll the balls, then fry the balls, then maybe bake the balls, then put the balls into a tomato sauce to simmer. That's a lot of ball preparation.

Orange Ricotta Pancakes

I am going to give you the most glorious way to use up that leftover container of ricotta that has been sitting in the back of the fridge since used in last week's lasagna. Pancakes. Moist and dense, but still light and airy. Full of orange flavor, sweet and delicious. The ultimate saturday morning don't get out of your pajamas until at least 1:30 breakfast. The only way to feel comforted in the middle of a Polar Vortex. These pancakes are many things. Let them be your emotional comforter.

Roasted Cauliflower & Pomegranate Salad

Happy New Year! Let's eat cauliflower! After all the chocolate, champagne, butter, puff pastry, cookies, cookies & more cookies, lobster, cream sauce, heavy whipping cream, wine and more wine I'm looking to eliminate some saturated fat from my diet and increase my fruit and vegetable intake. How about you? Easier said than done. First, I need to throw all these cookies to the garbage that are invading my headspace. Which will, in turn, cause my soul to cry out for all that butter waste! BUTTER! I will admit, I was thoroughly looking forward to eating rich, creamy, dreamy food during family gatherings and such, but after having my fill, well, I'm full. I plan on the next few days to really focus on drinking tea with lemon when my reflexes are telling me to eat cocoa-dusted truffles. I'll be trying to refrain from eating for spans of a time when my brain says "hey, it's been 39 minutes since the last flavor affair, feed me." After a couple days of depriving my brain of sugar and alcohol I assume {hope} the shakes, fits, and tantrums will dissipate.  Raisins will be my new sweet. Full of healthy antioxidants. And cauliflower salad will be my main dish. All the mental anguish is worth the way my body and mind feel after a week of healthy eating habits. So. Much. Better. Than. Sugar. Butter. World. Promise.

Chia Almond Granola

Let's get talkin' about granola. The homemade kind, like, is there any other kind?!?! Not in my world. 

My kiddos eat it. Hooray. It turns plain yogurt into amazing, to-die-for, let's eat this whole bowl, and have second and thirds good. Double Hooray. My husband lines the bottom of his squirrel traps with it. Hooray? 

He has watched every single episode of Duck Dynasty (some more than once) on Amazon Prime and now he thinks I need to cook him some squirrel Miss Kay style. Eating squirrel is something I left behind in my 7-year-old girl days when my parent's were the boss of what went into my mouth. Now I'm the boss of what enters my mouth and I say no squirrel goes in my mouth. On second thought, I take that back. This blog could really get popular with culinary squirrel enthusiasts if I created a squirrel recipe worth preparing and eating. Hmmm. How I included squirrel recipes and granola in the same post is beyond me. Let's get back to the granola. Shall we?

Nutty Seed Bread

I'm talking about bread again? Haven't I talked about bread a lot lately? My last bread recipe included olives, ham, bacon and alotta eggs. And then about a week before that was a Swedish Rye Bread that had me considering the word "limpa". In the same month was Pumpkin Cinnamon Rolls which I deem bread category material. 

Because we are facing the second day after two days of Christmas eating and drinking extravaganza-ness I think bread needs to leave my radar. My radar should be full of the kale in this cookbook I received as a gift. At least I have a guide and a place to start. Positive thinking.

Expect kale people. From now on. Until then you need to deal with bread. Maybe we can feel good about this bread because it's so seedy and nutty that it's comparable to eating 6 handfuls of nuts with every bite. Not really, but close.

Mac n' Cheese Bites

Since starting my blog a little under 6 months ago this recipe is going to be my second version of macaroni and cheese. If I keep blogging for, let's say 7 years, at a rate of 2 macaroni and cheese recipes per every 6 months, times 7 years, that will be: Ahhh.... Where's my calculator? 

Let's just say that is my type of math problem! 

Ok! Ok. I got it. It's 7 X 4. 28! That's almost 30 mac n' cheese variations my adventuresome boys get to consume like the guinea pigs I use them as. Lucky them. 

Oven Roasted Pork Roast

Small children, in my experience, are not always big meat eaters. The texture of meat for kids can be too chewy. I've watched my son as a two-year-old chew on a piece of chicken for what seemed like 10 minutes because he didn't know what to do with it. The piece of food was never getting smaller. What is wrong with this thing in my mouth? It isn't going anywhere. What do I do with it? How do I swallow it? Erm, I'll just spit it out. Splat.

No splatting with pot roast. Perfectly roasted pot roast melts in your mouth. And I've found it's one of the best ways to get my kiddos to devour meat. They almost always want more! I love those words. Yes, food is love.

Making pot roast is a very easy way to prepare an inexpensive cut of meat, feed a family, and it's a hands off way to make your house smell heavenly. Let's do it!

Sparkling Raspberry Gelatin

Did you grow up with Jell-o Jigglers? If you are a child of the 80's, most likely, you did. Do you know what is in Jell-o? It's in my nature to say: poison. My apologies to Kraft.... not really. 

I'd much rather eat my jello with health benefits. And this recipe does the trick. 

According to wellnessmama.com gelatin is practically a superfood! Gelatin is great for hair, skin and nails. Helps lubricate joints. Can help with digestion. Is a source of protein. And it's natural! MMMM. Let's make jigglers!

Ham & Olive Loaf

I'm not sure how I've lived my life up to this point without this bread in my recipe rotation. My life has been utterly meaningless. Life without bread studded with chunks of ham and salty olives of all colors is so boring.

The egg-y crumb of this bread makes me want to almost call it a breakfast bread. Who am I kidding? I shouldn't use the word almost. I should say: Yes, this was my breakfast for 3 straight days. Topped with butter and nuked in the micro, my life suddenly had meaning. 

My brain just didn't function correctly since the day I pinned a picture of the original recipe 5 weeks ago! That's 5 weeks of Bread Brain Fog. My poor family. They'd been wondering where their mother had gone. She's in her own culinary dreamworld. Alas! My dreamworld is a reality! And this reality is sooooooo good.

Italian Ravioli Egg Bake

Do you like egg bake? I'm wondering if it's a Midwestern thing? After a quick Google search on Midwestern quirks egg bake does not appear. I'd imagine I would need to dig further into a search using words like 'traditional Midwestern foods' or 'Minnesota regional favorites'. Alas, I didn't do that. 

However, I did briefly read some impressions on our funny speech characteristics and quirky personality traits. One brutally honest review caught my eye detailing our use of the greeting "How are you?". Which, to be honest, took me until 31 years of life to really fully accept that people don't want to know your emotional state they just want you to automatically reply "Fine, and you?". Well, Mr. Scathing Review - I have a way to combat the Fine How Are You. Egg bake. 

Rosemary Roll & Slice Shortbread

I have about 3 or 4 cookie recipes in my regular cookie rotation. Pumpkin Spice Chocolate Chippers make it in about once or twice a year, Zucchini Chocolate Chip Cookies are made about 2 times during the zucchini months, the Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe from the back of the Toll House bag when I feel like washing dishes and eating 3 cookies after every meal and these crispity, crunchity, herby, buttery babies.

Any other cookie recipes from here on out will be completely experimental. You've been forewarned. 

Maca Energy Truffles

It's eerily quiet in my house this Thanksgiving morning. There isn't a dish in the sink, no pots bubbling. My hair isn't piled atop my head, elbows deep into a pie crust, flour on my nose, timers beeping loudly, onion skins littering the floor below. That would be more my style. So, as I look around my utterly way too clean kitchen wondering what on earth is wrong with me I just relax and leave it to my father who is doing the cooking this year I write a grocery list and head to the grocery store! Exactly. That's what I do. I cook.

These truffles would be a great thing to un-cook for the holidays, un-cook because they require no cooking! Measure, Dump, Stir, Form into balls and eat. And I guess you might call them health food? Maca is a root that was used in ancient Peru as an aphrodisiac and mood lifter! Isn't that great? Because judging from my post yesterday, I might need a mood lift.

Twix Bars

 

I love shortbread. Like, a lot. It's my downfall at Starbucks. I love it so much, it was one of my first blog posts. Something about the crunch and texture. Like kinda sandy.

Once, in line at Marshall's, I was buying shortbread because the cookies stare at you in the check-out aisle, taunting you to make an impulse buy, fueling your shopping adventures with more sugar, I asked the checkout girl if she had ever tried the shortbread that stare at her day in and day out for hours on end? Why no, she was not a fan of my beloved shortbread because they are, and I quote, "sandy" cookies.

That is what she said. I couldn't believe it. Sandy! Cookies! Never thought of shortbread in that way, but I guess she's right. Gah! But I digress. Because these sandy cookies are covered in caramel and chocolate. And that makes any sandy cookie a yummy cookie.